Maybe it’s because I’m older and wiser, but I’ve noticed that the things which now bring me to tears are fewer the everyday instances of hurt, pain and sadness, but more the unexpected moments of joy, reconciliations and serendipity. Maybe as we advance in years and become more numbed to experiences of tragedy we become more easily moved to tears by the sudden simple beauties that were always before us but appeared at an untimely early age when we still believed the world owed us more.
All I know is the less time I have left here the more important I find it is to plan a clean exit on a high note.
This small epiphany and the wrinkles are how I know for certain that I’ve finally grown up.

𝘌𝘕𝘑𝘖𝘠 𝘊𝘈𝘙𝘐𝘕𝘎 𝘍𝘖𝘙 𝘠𝘖𝘜𝘙 𝘔𝘖𝘔 𝘕𝘖𝘞.𝘖𝘕𝘌 𝘋𝘈𝘠 𝘠𝘖𝘜’𝘓𝘓 𝘞𝘈𝘕𝘛 𝘛𝘖 𝘈𝘎𝘈𝘐𝘕.

I bought more panties, bras and pads than any gay man should.

More comfy purses to fit my arms than any straight man would.

To beauty parlors, nail salons and pharmacies with you

Been here and there and everywhere…I’m not sure what I’ll do.

The little walks and tearful talks and stories of your life

Have filled our days with laughs so thick, can’t cut them with a knife.

I get us lost, you drive me mad and tell me what to do

But we always end up back at home…I’m not sure what I’ll do.

The butts of jokes and puns of posts that make so many happy

That Q-Tip hair, the clothes you wear on Facebook looks so snappy.

So many pics that you have nixed and some you never knew

You make life fun to be your son…I’m not sure what I’ll do.

Clockwork calling days and nights to see how your day went

And kindly and reciprocally, you ask how mine was spent.

I can’t imagine how it’ll be some day when yours are through

You’re woven so deep in my days and weeks…I’m not sure what I’ll do.

No clue what I will do.